Tuesday, March 20, 2012

Human Subjects







Like other research institutions, the Cracker County Institute of Agriculture and Technology has a protocol for those situations where human subjects are involved.  However, one of the things that attracted Dr Betsy Mountwell to the Institute was that its Human Subjects Program had a protocol that largely was concerned with the safe disposal of human remains.  Betsy's research required many of her laboratory assistants to make the ultimate sacrifice for science, and at her previous university the questions she faced about the number of her assistants' disappearances were beginning to become uncomfortable.  Therefore, her recruitment by the CCIAT was as timely as it was welcome.

As has been noted, Betsy strongly believes in involving herself personally in her research.  While the project illustrated here was progressing rapidly to term, the progress was a bit more rapid than Betsy had planned, and she was anxious to discover if she could truly bear the final result of this experiment.  She did not want to introduce any variables, such as an X-ray, into this protocol, so an autopsy on an unadulterated version of the experiment was somewhat urgently needed.

While not quite willing, Betsy's assistant was quite ready and able to provide the means to answer the professor's critical question.  And though it was not the most efficient way to prepare the human subject for her autopsy, she knew her benefactors from the Cracker County Clan would find it quite entertaining!

Wednesday, March 7, 2012

Performance Review!






Like all employees at the Cracker County Public Library, Patty Van Dyke is subject to periodic performance reviews, and this picture illustrates the scene of her most recent.  The library had just hired a new head librarian, Miss Barbara Connell, and she had made it clear upon her introduction to the staff that she believed in discipline and that she had unique methods to instill that discipline.  Patty, for her part, was quite taken by her new boss, because not only is she a bibliophile, but she is also quite a "-phile" for women with busty, authoritarian figures like Miss Connell.  However, when Miss Connell called Patty to her office for her review on a recent Friday, Patty was caught a little off-guard.

Officially, Fridays are "casual-dress" at the library, but to the all-female staff, it is "Slut Night", and the girls play this out by teasing one another with suggestive outfits throughout the afternoon until closing, after which, a post-work "pleasing" party ensues.  The good girl Patty is, she tries to make her contributions as subtle as possible by foregoing undergarments rather that wearing something revealing, but, still, the other girls and the patrons find her arousing enough during her parades through the stacks and her frequent reaching and bending for books.

So when Patty sat down with Miss Connell in her office, one look at Patty's tight sweater told the head librarian that this review would require her to use her unique methodology.  She stood and strode around the office as she complimented Patty, "Your knowledge and application of library science is exemplary, you are punctual, and your helpful attitude towards the patrons is a benefit to this institution", then, once behind Patty, she asked her to stand.  Patty suddenly felt the familiar constriction of her arms being tightly bound behind her.  "But your adherence to the dress code seems to leave something to be desired."  And with that, she picked up a pair of shears and began to investigate beneath Patty's tight sweater and skirt.

As Patty's bra-less and panty-less guilt was revealed, she couldn't help a few seductive glances at her supervisor; after all, this wasn't so far from what she wanted to do with Miss Connell anyway.  "Did you find what you were looking for?  Anything that you like?"  Patty couldn't help her impertinence, and it infuriated Miss Connell.   "You shameless hussy!  Is that what you want?  For everyone to behave like you?"  And with that, Miss Connell began to disrobe!  "Let's just see how you like it if everyone goes around exposing themselves, Miss Van Dyke!"  The truth was, Patty liked it just fine, but she wasn't sure if she should say so, being bound, and eyeing those big scissors that Miss Connell placed on her desk while she took off her clothes.

Finally, down to just her garter belt, stockings, and heels, the bespectacled chief glared at her charge.  "Is this how you think we should run a library?"  "Well, maybe not during working hours, but...well, what are you doing later?" Patty asked, pushing another of Miss Connell's buttons.  "Oooo!  You just won't see the point of this...but maybe I have something that will help you."  Miss Connell stepped to her desk and reached underneath.  Patty heard a click, then a whirring sound as a punishment horse--a specialized one--descended from the ceiling. When the horse descended low enough, Miss Connell took the thick electrical cable that ran from underneath it and plugged it into an outlet on the floor.  "Whether or not you meet my expectations is going to depend upon your performance on this horse--mount up!"

Patty obediently straddled the horse, positioning herself in the obvious spot, and Miss Connell set the device in an upward motion.  "I am going to correct your behavior if it takes all night" Miss Connell threatened, but Patty didn't think that was such a bad idea at all.  The rising horse seemed more pleasuring than punishing, and as it proceeded in its intended way, Patty ask saucily, "Does this mean we're engaged?"  Patty could see that her object of desire was reaching her breaking point.  "You won't think this is so funny when I'm cutting off your hair, which I will do if you do not fulfill my expectations!"

However, as Patty was fulfilled by her bosses expectations, she had little doubt that she would earn an exemplary review...even if it took all night!

As I remember it...

...this is how it looked:





Now, obviously, I didn't draw this.  It was an ad in a magazine I peeked at a long time ago for a scandalous John Willie book, and I always wondered if he had been to Cracker County.  This scene is eerily played out often during the public corporal punishments meted out on Gomorrah Square by our county's Matrons of the Whip, so I thought that might have been his inspiration.

When I finally acquired this book, however, (The Adventures of Sweet Gwendoline), I discovered that the above ladies were in two different pictures.  But now (ha, ha!) I have photoshop, and I have set things right!